Cruel Truth

Better a cruel truth than a comfortable delusion. - Edward Abbey

The Meaning of Christmas

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Matt Groening

Exchanging Gifts

What a pity human beings can't exchange problems. Everyone knows exactly how to solve the other fellow's. – Olin Miller 


An interesting concept but would it be in the true sense of Christmas giving?


(Other posts on Christmas)

True Gift Giving

True giving is when you find an individual or a family that is not able to give back to you. - Rev. Runney Patterson Sr.


This is what we have grown up with. This is the altruistic ideal stated succinctly. To give a gift to ones equal, and they to you, is only a trade - not true giving. Lord knows trade is sinful because it presupposes profit which is downright evil because it assumes selfishness. In order to practice true giving this season you need to find an individual or family which has nothing to give back to you. That leaves out your family or spouse - one would assume even though they may lack financial means they probably have other values to give in return. Your co-workers could probably benefit you in some way so scratch them off of your list. Business associates (customers, suppliers, etc.) are likewise eliminated. Your friends are off the list because since they are friends they may very well help you out if you needed them. The same could probably be said of your neighbors even if you don't know them - they are potential friends at a minimum. Your minister should be eliminated because he is indeed the one who freely gives you the moral imperative you are acting on. That brings into question the church - but we probably shouldn't go there; besides they are just the conduit to the really deserving, not the end itself (right?). Charities fall in the same category. Your dog and cat!.....no, they return love and obedience.


This is getting tough.....Let's see if we can define who would be a worthy recipient of our largess:
This individual must have nothing of value which they might relinquish in return for your gift.
This individual must have no ability to work since they might just mow your lawn as an act of appreciation for your gift.
This individual must have no sense of humor or story telling ability which might enhance your life.
This individual must have no exceptional knowledge which might be of value to you.


So far all I have been able to come up with is a low level government worker.....but I'll keep looking and let you know.


(Since you are probably of value I didn't get you a gift - trying to stay with the true sense of the season, you know.)

Getting Out of Town

Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit. - Kin Hubbard



I suppose it depends on your perspective if this is a good thing or not.

A Gift From Santa

I found this in an old garage sale trunk. It is a cover to the "Pictorial Gravure Section" of the Sunday Oregonian, December 7, 1930. It was painted by Andrew Loomis with the caption "There IS a Santa Claus." The young lady being presented on a silver platter has a gift tag attached to her ankle which reads "For a Good Boy!"

Now before you go all weird on me with claims of sexism, hear me out.

This was 1930 (even before I was born) but things didn't change very rapidly in those days so I'm sure it was the same as when I was growing up.

This was before women were equal. At that time they weren't - they were special. If the boat was sinking it was "Women and children first." I bet putting "women" before "children" was intentional in this old saying. Women were special - more special than children.

When I was growing up the worst offense you could commit was being disrespectful to your mom or grandmother. If you did it generally got you a whoppin' (1). This punishment was generally carried out in the woodshed (outside the house) because it was not to be seen by the women of the house - they were special - it was a lesson taught to a boy so that he may become an honorable man. The only time I was punished in such a manner was for this very offense and it only took once to see the error of my ways and convince me that women were indeed special. I'm not talking about a simple slap on the wrists nor am I talking about child abuse. It hurt. I knew I had done wrong. I was sent to bed without dinner (2).

"But!" you say "Women didn't originally even have the right to vote!" Look at how our country was formed. It was a Representative Republic. Representatives were elected (Senators, Representatives) and they were originally elected by the men - the head of the households. The men voted as the Representative of their family. They voted for their children, their wives and their country. Times changed and so did the election procedure (or was it the other way around?). The Nineteenth Amendment to the Constitution went into effect in 1920 (ten years before this painting) but women were still special. Perhaps women should mourn (a little bit anyway) the day they became truly equal.

(1) You got a "whopping" rather than a "whipping" because a whip was what was used on a horse or cow. A whip used on these critters is not cruel - their hide is much, much thicker than a kids. A whopping generally was done with dad's belt or a shaving strap (a leather strap used to sharpen a razor). Both were a couple of inches wide.

(2) Being sent to bed without dinner was a punishment about equal to getting a whopping. Though we were never short on calories, I'm sure we were deficient in vitamins. Food was not shipped all over the world and fresh fruit and vegetables was not available in the winter-time. You lived on meat and canned goods. It is possible for your belly to be full but still be hungry.